Friday 19 October 2012

Baby 63, 64 &; 65- Adaptation

I sat Baldur on the floor in front of me. "Now sit there and don't move. I'm trying to watch Heroes, and you are not helping." Baldur finally sits still for more than a minute and begins to look almost absorbed in the episode. "Mummy. Who's that man?" he asks, as Nathan wanders around doing politics. "Nathan Petrelli. He can fly like brother Loki can." I respond. Screenshot-24I'm heavily pregnant, and glad that I have already take it upon myself to teach Baldur his life skills. That would have been terrible to do at this stage. I settle myself further into the seat. Electra was right. It would be terrible to be a sofa. "Thank you sofa." I say, quietly. I am snapped out of my musings by the vibrating of my mobile. I have no idea what possessed Levi's to put pockets near the crotch on their jeans, but I REALLY wish they hadn't.
Skye- Hey Parker! 
Paisley-Hey.
Skye-I can hear how sad you are. What's going on?
She explained to me how she felt that she cheated, and I said calmly, "Geez, you're an idiot."
Excuse me! she said defensively. That was mean, thank you! 
I laughed warmly. Paisley, it's okay! Don't think that, please. You did not cheat on me. It's just your job.
Paisley- I'm sorry, but that doesn't make me feel any better, Everard. It really doesn't. I can't explain it, but I just... I feel bad.
I sighed. I wish I didn't live so far away. I want to come over there and slap you.
Paisley-You know, I think I'm just going to go to bed. Night.
Oops. I may have ruined something quite important there. I push the thought from my mind and return to Heroes in time to see Hiro teleporting away to New York for the first time. You know what? I didn't want to see Peter Petrelli fly ANYWAY. If it wasn't the decorators tramping up and down MY staircase all day to redecorate the bedroom, it was my son making noise. Screenshot-25Of course, everybody would choose that moment to get home from school. Hela comes in with her hands locked between Patches (her former imaginary friend turned boyfriend) and her big sister Frigga. Frigga in turn is holding onto the hand of her current boy, Michael Dann. It’s nice that my kids are all so close with one another right now, especially since we’re used to it being the other way around.  I turn off the TV and ease myself up. This pregnancy has been hell. I blame Paisley. I mean, it was her kid that fathered the child, right? Oh yeah! I never did say. The father of my children was none other than Erik Parker. We’d sperm banked it again because it honestly didn’t feel right, what with me dating his mother and all. But if I hadn’t… lets just say he’s one of my favourite children.
Screenshot-26They were discussing the costume party that one of their friends was having and what they were going to go as. It was strange to think that it had been a year since I’d had Leilah and the escapade with her, but I wouldn’t change this life for anything. Frigga says, “Mum; we need you do do us a favour, well two actually.” and puts on her most adorable face. “Go on….” I reply, suddenly suspicious. Hela jumps in. “We need you to put on the last scenes of Of Mice and Men for our study assignment.” she says, but this shouldn’t be a problem, so why are they asking? Frigga then continues. “And you need to make us costumes which will be so totally kick-ass that nobody even looks at anyone else.” Ah. That would be why. They expect manual labour from the pregnant woman. Costumes and films. Gotcha.”
I nod, happy to be of some use to my kids and be able to put my sewing skills to good use as well. Of course nowadays there isn’t much cause for sewing so it isn’t a skill I can use regularly. I ease myself up reasonably quickly and waddle to the DVD rack. Somewhere in the mess of cases I find our copy of Of Mice And Men and I settle down to watch it with the family. Fenrir likes it because he loves the animals, and Baldur is napping on the floor. Hela and Frigga are absorbed in the footage, as am I until I realise what film I am watching.
Screenshot-27As he end credits roll I stand up and go to make dinner, but I keep crying into the pan. “Lennie didn’t do it on purpose. Why did George have to do that? They could have just hidden Lennie or something. CURSE YOU JOHN STEINBECK. Now I’m crying on the pasta.” I manage to finish cooking and serve up a nutritional meal to my children. However, it seems that once again I am destined to miss dinner, because I go into labour after just a couple of bites. Eventually, I give birth to baby 63, Parker Everard, 64-Annie Everard and their brother Beckett Everard -65.Screenshot-5I age them up into toddlers at the party that night and they are beautiful babies. Screenshot-3And then it is time for the birthday of Fenrir. Fortunately for their costume party, Hela and Frigga are still only B’s so they will not be aging up just yet. The party is on Friday night, so they will be growing up in a couple of days time on Saturday morning.

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