Baby 75- You can imagine the Christmas dinners...

I look anxiously at the door to the large house in front of me. The paint is perfectly smooth, and it pretty much matches the rest of the house’s exterior in its neat perfection. I take in a large breath and steady myself. 

Unfortunately for me, there was no need to do that because Paisley knocks for me; three loud raps, which would have been heard throughout the house. I turn around to glare at her, and she shrugs amiably, like this is the best time she’s ever had.

The door opens inwards, and I’m not surprised to see my sister (still getting used to that one) stood in the doorway. “Hey Skye. Would you like to come in?” she asks, and I nod. My entire family- well not the entire one, that would be 74 children and too much of a fuss- walks into the house.

Just around the corner is my younger brother, Azure. He looks about as excited to be here as I am, probably because he’s a big star in the sports universe and he’d much rather be outside than in here. I wave at him, and he smiles back before Sapphire ushers us away. She shouts to our parents, “Mom, Dad! Skye’s here. She comes bearing grandchildren.”

My father is the next person that I see, he comes through an archway dressed in a shirt and a pair of jeans, which I guess must be a casual look for him. “Skye.” He beamed, smiling at me warmly. “And Paisley, and so many grandchildren.” He continues. He’s the first member of my family to actually acknowledge Paisley’s presence in the house and is quickly becoming my favourite. “Your mother is in the kitchen, cooking dinner. I hope you like pie, because Azure spent all morning making one for dessert too.” He continues and this time it’s my turn to smile. They made pie!

A small hand tugs on my arm, it’s Steve. He’s escaped from Banner’s grip on his hand and made his way over to me. “Mum? Can we go outside? It’s warm in here.” He asks quietly.  I nod at him. “In a second,” I reply. “Maybe Grandpa can take you.”

James eagerly scoops up Steve, and followed by Stark and Edward they walk outside. Banner and Bruce go to talk to Sapphire, leaving Paisley and I alone. We walk through the large dining room to the kitchen. It’s even warmer in there, and through a pot rack I can see my mother standing near a stove and glaring at a pan. “Hi Mrs Everard!” calls Paisley. 

My mother jumps a little and the baby in my belly kicks. I consider telling it off, but then I realize how strange that might look.  Apparently having recovered, my mother responds with a frosty “Skye, Paisley. How are you doing?” We both respond, making niceties and small talk, until Opal asks to talk to me alone.

“I said that you could bring whoever it was that you were dating for dinner, not some random friend.” She hisses quietly. I pause for a second, thinking about what to say. “Well I’m sorry to disappoint mother, but newsflash? I’m dating Paisley, so you’re just gonna have to suck it up and get over it.” I reply angrily. My mother glares at me for a second, but eventually seems to give up trying to be okay with it. “Just keep your hands off each other. I’m not having such a disgrace to my family in this house.”

I consider replying, but eventually decide that it’s not worth it and just walk into the lounge. Paisley, bless her, follows me without saying anything, and together we walk outside into the frosty autumn air. I walk around to the back of the house where I can see Sapphire and Banner talking together near a stable. I didn’t notice before, but her hair is now a white and red combo, not whatever colour it was last time, so I guess that she must have dyed it. She waves at me, and I return it, before taking Paisley’s hand and continuing to gaze around the large garden. My Dad and brother are in the other corner playing tag and raking leaves with Bruce, the twins and Steve. I lean on Paisley’s shoulder, and we sit down on the edge of the deck while he puts an arm around me. “One day, this will be our family.” I sigh, and Paisley hums a response as I drift into a light sleep on her shoulder. For once my dreams are normal and happy, there’s me and Parker on a picnic blanket in some park, and she’s leaning on me and we’re happy.  I wake up that way, but I can’t say I stay it for long.

My mother calls us inside for lunch, we’re having some sort of salad dish, but it gives me the most intense urge to vomit I've ever had. I was used to morning (all day really) sickness, but this wasn't fair. Opal was going to think I hated her cooking and never let me back into the house. As it was, I managed to swallow down enough that it looked like I’d eaten, and that was what counted.

We make our excuses and manage to get out before dessert, but James gets us to bring the pie home, and I can’t say I’m complaining because it’s free pie, but I do feel bad for taking their dessert.

My sister once again takes us to the door, and gives me a hug as we leave. While we’re close she says to me, “Don’t worry, mom freaked out the first time I brought a girlfriend home as well.” I look at her as if to say, What, you too? But she shakes her head. “I went through a phase.” She clarifies. I find myself hoping that Paisley isn't just a phase.

Fortunately for me, my not-a-phase girlfriend offers to drive home, and I manage to get some shut-eye. I’d slept at Opal’s, but Steve wasn't a huge fan of getting through the nights, and Paisley knew just how tired I was. I find myself dreaming about the events which lead to us visiting my mother in the first place.

Two Days Ago

The next of the Avengers to visit me (and the penultimate male) is Clint Barton. He meets me in a small IVF clinic on the outskirts of town and wait for our appointment. We chat quietly-despite being the only people in the waiting room- and he seems pretty friendly. Most of our conversation centres on Stark and missions, he seems to enjoy talking about those two subjects, though he’s not as fond of talking about the Avengers’ first mission and so far the only one a film had been made of. But regardless, we laugh a lot and have a great half hour until a doctor calls us in.

The procedure worked as normal, and an hour and a half later we both walk out, me with a soon-to-be child, and Clint with… well nothing. But he has the promise of a future child too.  The drive back to my home is long enough to be relaxing, and to top it off rain was falling gently from the sky, hinting at a large storm rolling in.

As I pull into the garage Bruce walks around the corner of the house to meet me at the gate. “You’re back!” He cheers, followed by a hastily added “Grandma Opal called. Asked you to call her back.”

And I do just that, though unwillingly. “Hey Mom.” I say when she picks up. It’s only moments before she’s freaking me out. “Skye, darling. It’s so good to hear from you, “ (she’d last spoken to me a week ago) “I was wondering if you and your boyfriend, whoever that may be, wanted to come to lunch on Saturday? It would be a really nice chance to get to know your family a little more.” She inquires.

Needless to say, I’m lost for words. “Uh… sure Mum. That would be great. I’ll see you on Saturday. I’ll bring the kids.” Then I hang up. There’s only so much crazy family I can take.  My next job is to text Paisley.

You, me my kids. Saturday, dinner at my mother’s?-Skye

Okay. Meet at yours before facing the dragon?-PP

Yep. PS: Got some news. Love you. –Skye

And that is the sum total of our conversation. I never said we wasted time on these things.

The baby chooses that precise moment to make it’s presence known and I giggle quietly before changing into a more comfortable maternity outfit.“MOOOOOMMMM!” yells Stark, and I head towards the source of the shouts.

“WHAAATTTTT?” I call back as I walk into the room.

“Steve pooped.” He says. I pull a face, but reach into the crib beside my son to pull out Steve. He wasn’t wrong. The smell coming from my child is overwhelming. “Come on you,” I mutter, “Time to get changed and potty train.” He just looks at me blankly before yelling “JUICE!” I sigh.

“And then you’re learning to talk.”

Most of the afternoon is spent doing just that. Every so often I’ll have to go and pee because being pregnant does that to you, and then I also tend to throw up as well because guess what- it’s ANOTHER side effect of pregnancy.

But after teaching Steve his skills, I find myself with nothing to do. Bored out of my mind, and suffering from extreme hormonal imbalance I make the executive decision to just do whatever. Whatever turns out to be working out while I watch a Twilight marathon on TV. Normally I’d hate it, but I was unfortunately lacking in the ‘things to watch on TV’ front. So I did that. And around 6:30, I went to start dinner as Banner an Bruce worked on their homework for the AP classes they were taking.

Of course, by then I was also tired out of all reason. I’d spent the afternoon working out, not something I did very often, and I was exhausted. So I took a bath, got everyone ready for sleep, and then went to bed myself.

The next morning was a Friday, so of course I have to get the kids ready for school. And of course today would be field trip day, so of course I have to pack them lunches. I get pretty pissed off whenever I actually have to do anything for my kids, probably because I was raised (if you could call it that) to be independent and free willed.

But regardless of that, they managed to get on the bus on time and I prepared myself for another lazy day. In a fit of boredom I decide that I’m going to try out the sauna on the back of my bathroom, which has so far sat unused and unloved. I honestly don’t know why. After an hour in there I’m more relaxed than well… ever!

Unfortunately, I knew it wasn't to last and Steve then decides to wake up from his sleep- an entire four hours after I first got him down. And that’s a long time for him. So I’m woken from a light doze and go to care for him, before we walk outside. Me with an easel to paint with, and Steve with a few toys and his imaginary friend doll. We pass the rest of the afternoon that way and it actually surprises me when the kids come home, I get so involved with what I’m doing. Sadly for me I’m not the best painter, so even something as rubbish as what I was doing took lots of time.

We sit around on the floor in my room trading stories of the day of the kids’ various antics. Of course Stark and Edward managed to get themselves locked in a prison cell. But it serves them right for sneaking in in the first place.

We go to bed that night happy and content. Except Steve. He refuses to sleep until around four in the morning and I can’t say I’m complaining. The longer I stay awake, the fewer nightmares I have. Lately they've been me and Paisley as teenagers, but there’s something wrong with the me in them and I’m just not right. They scare me so much that I actually relish staying awake.

Conveniently, morning comes soon and I manage to start getting ready to visit my mother. We need to be off by around nine AM, so I’m very pleased to have been awake since six, since there will undoubtedly be many kids for me to prepare for dinner. In the end I slip into a simple top and trousers getup, one of the few that still fits in my heavily pregnant form, and am doing my makeup when Paisley arrives.

She’s wearing orange, as usual, and more fall shades, and I can’t say I’m complaining. The colours make her skin glow an she’s the happiest I've seen her in a while. But something seems off and I can’t put my finger on it. I decide to let it slide for the time being and we gather the children ready to go. Thankfully I have enough sense to own one of the largest cars ever invented, so there’s no issue with fitting everyone in.

We set off down the country road to Eltham’s Drift, the town my parents are currently living in, and soon fields and orange-leaved trees are passing by us. I’m rendered incredibly thankful for the fact that my parents live near the bridge connecting our island to the mainland  because without that I think I would have freaked out so much. Less than two hours after we leave, I fins myself facing my parents’ door in trepidation, wondering why I managed to let myself be talked into coming here.

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“Paisley, I just went into labour.” I mumble, still half asleep. She glances at me before looking back at the road. Quickly, she takes a turning to our old home of Sunset Valley, knowing that they’re probably the closest town with a functional hospital. She drives at break-neck speeds down the roads and we’re there in about forty five minutes, by which time my contractions are four minutes apart.

We get checked in, I’m sent to a ward and Paisley takes the kids home as quickly as possible. When she returns, I've just gotten back from giving birth to my next little baby girl, Calinda Everard.

Wow. I only have 25 babies to go. Rest assured, these next ones are gonna be drama, drama, drama. Literally. We have so much going on its ridiculous.

Thank you all for sticking with me this far, even if you just turned up. It means a lot that you’re even here. Now I doubt anyone will read this note, so just to test I want you to work in the word Sparkles to your comment somehow. Even if you just add it to the end, just to see if somebody actually cares what the writer has to say.
Oh, and what Skye said about being raised independently- that's pretty true to writer's life. They basically just leave me to get on with stuff, so I have no idea what I'm supposed to write Skye like, so I just write her like my parents are. 

Goodbye for now, my loyal minions- I mean readers. 

Baby 74 Out of Time

I had called for a family meeting in the lounge. This pretty much just consisted of Paisley, Victoria, Carmen, Evita, Bruce and Banner. The rest of the kids are too young to understand much around them, and I honestly can't be bothered with the faff of waking them up for this. 

"Okay." I begin, still thinking about what to say. "I wanted to know if any of you guys had a problem with me getting a job in theatre for a while. There's a production of Phantom on, and somebody once told me that if I got the chance I should go for it and try for a part." There's a long silence after I ask the question, and Banner is the first to speak. "I think it would be a wonderful idea Mama. Especially since you like singing so much. But won't the babies be a problem?" she asks. I give it thought for a second. 

"I doubt anyone would mind." Evita says. "I mean, they'd have Skye fraking Everard on their stage." 

While I'm not the world’s biggest fan of her use of Battlestar Galactica curse words, I take the compliment with a pinch of salt. Paisley has so far not said anything, but she doesn't seem to have a problem with it. "I'm cool with it." is the general response after the initial doubts.

The auditions for the part are later that day, and I arrive in plenty of time. Very few people are there before me, and I start taking to them. There are a number of parts available, and I hope that I'll be able to work with some of the girls.
Surprisingly, the auditions are very brief. We sing a couple of lines, and then say a couple, and the director and his team of officials just tell us to go, and they'll post the list on the theatre doors in half an hour. I stand there for a while, before deciding to text Paisley. Most of the conversation is regular, but then I'm interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. 

Behind me is stood a man I never thought I'd see again. My former boyfriend, Erik. I stand there for a moment, vaguely stunned, but in the end it's Erik who speaks first. "Skye. I saw your audition, well of course I did, I'm directing. I wanted to congratulate you personally. You got the main role." 

I look shocked for a minute, before I reply. "Thank you." I whisper, and I hug him tentatively. He reciprocates, and when he lets go he responds, "I'll pin the list up then we can have lunch."  

This done we take a trip to his office, where he pulls out a couple of sandwiches, muttering distractedly, “I’m sorry it’s not something more.” I shrug my shoulders and put down the sandwich after taking a bite. “So, what brought you to my little town?” I ask, and he shrugs noncommittally.

“They needed someone to direct their performances. I took the offer, and here we are. Though I admit, I had no idea you were in town.” I nod. “So… how are the relationships treating you?” he asks.

“I’m in a pretty steady thing right now. With the most wonderful person. I’ve never met someone who understands me better. You?” I inquire.

“Nobody. But there is a beautiful girl I have my eye on in the chorus. Her name’s Meg. She’s got the most wonderful blonde hair I’ve ever seen.” I snort with laughter and Erik raises an eyebrow in his typical way.

“Sorry,” I giggle. “It’s just… she sounds just like the demon from Supernatural.” And with that I burst out laughing again, which even earns a chuckle from Erik. “I suppose it does a bit. Though I’ll confess I haven’t seen her eyes turn black just yet.” We spend the next fifteen minutes off and on catching up and laughing about that. It ends in a careful decision to remain friends, and to keep exchanging news on the status of Meg, and her possible demonic possession.

When I return home, I am greeted by Paisley talking to none other than Captain America. I gawk for a minute, before he notices me and introduces himself. “Steve Rodgers. I’m uh… here to have children with you.” He says, blushing red. Behind him, Paisley is pointing madly and pulling faces, but I ignore her. “Ah yeah. I can tell you’re a little nervous. Good news. We… Paisley and I… don’t feel comfortable considering our relationship, so we use the new IVF treatments rather than the conventional manner.”

Captain America passes out on my carpet. When he comes to, it is because of a kitten licking his nose. Oh yeah! Isis. Turns out she’s gotten pregnant and just after I had my babies, she welcomed along two more little ones into the world. I’ve jokingly nicknamed them Luci and Michael, after the two angels, because they’re always fighting. It’s sweet though, and totally harmless.

So I cart Steve off to the sperm bank, we get it done, and we’re home in time for dinner, courtesy of Mr Rodgers. He’s a 'wonderful' cook, and I tell him so. Repeatedly. Most of the kids just want to see his shield, which he’d brought for just that reason. Bruce and Banner sit staring at it, before running off to draw up some designs to make it better, and Stark likes to bash it so it makes noise.

It’s not long before he has to go though, and I think he might have been just a little pleased to get out of there. He’s not entirely used to the adoring female population yet. We wave him off and then go inside. The teens are moving out today, Carmen included and we were waiting until he’d visited to let them go.

Carmen is still her usual self, since she’s not changed in the past two weeks. Both Evita and Victoria are very sport oriented, but where Evita wants to become a soccer player, Victoria is a champion swimmer. Haven is very artistic, and wants to become a painter or an art teacher.

Checking the time, I realise that it is time we put the younger kids to bed, so I grab Stark and Edward to carry them to the nursery. When I’m there, I bathe them both and change them into their pyjamas ready for bed. I lean over their cribs and hum them to sleep, alternating between Smoke on the Water for Stark and Hey Jude for Edward. It works well enough, and they’re out like a light.

Banner is determined to age up as soon as possible so she can join shop club and the harder classes at school. I can’t say I can blame her. She and her brother are almost as smart as their father, so I’m perfectly happy to leave them to focus on their studies and improve. But I do draw the line at reading advanced particle physics book (I’m gonna have to talk to their dad abut that) at 10PM, when they `should be in bed. “Banner. Put down the book and go to sleep.” I say, and she grudgingly sets it on her nightstand and turns off the lamp.

I stick my head into Bruce’s room after that, and am more than pleased to discover that he’s fast asleep and dreaming. I walk over to tuck him back under his covers and turn off the bedside lamp. True to form he has a very thick book under his pillow I drag it out and see what it is. War and peace? I didn’t think we brought this with us. I think, but I place it on the bottom of his bed and leave the room.

With everyone in bed I figure a bath is in order. So I make a cup of tea and mosey into the bathroom. A bath seems like an amazing idea. After so many children I cherished the moments of me-time I got, though they were probably more numerous than most people’s.

I go to bed after that and am once again plague by nightmares. They’re becoming more and more common. I manage to stay in bed until around 5AM when my baby bump appears and I decide to prepare breakfast. I’m feeling like something cool is on the menu today. I make waffles, pancakes and cookies. (Un) fortunately, I’m pretty much the only one to eat any of the cookies and then it’s time to take the kids to school. I strap Edward and Stark into the back of the car and get all of us to school in plenty of time for the morning bell.

One the way back from school I call in at the grocery store to pick up a few essentials and on the way home, Stark convinces me to come to the park. So we take a detour and he and his brother have a wonderful time.

There’s another woman with kids their age in the park, and when I set down the twins I walk over and join her on a bench. We talk for a while about pointless mother things and the kids play together, but nothing else happens. Well… I eat a snow cone. But that’s it.

Around noon I bring Stark and Edward home and we start learning their skills and soon enough they've learned everything, and Banner and Bruce are home from school.

I’d agreed some time ago that as soon as they got on honor roll, they could age up, so after checking that that was the case I allow them to grow up into teens. Banner has a newfound interest in Chemistry and practically lives in the school labs. She also wears glasses because the late night reading strained her eyes.

Bruce is much the same, but his area of expertise is more physics. His eyes are still fine of course.

I also decide to age up the youngest. Edward is very outgoing and loud, but Stark is quieter and more reserved. He likes to play basketball though, the first of my kids to show that interest. Banner and Edward are very close, often he will sit and watch her science experiments while they go.

The highlight of the night must be when Bruce and Tony arrive to give the kids their presents though. In typical fashion, we have no idea that they’re coming and they turn up out of the blue. I hug both Avengers before they go to visit their children. They’re greeted with open arms, so I sit on the couch and decide to watch TV for a while. Supernatural is on, so I figure I may as well watch it, since I’m taking more than a few names soon enough for my future kids.

Unfortunately, just as it comes to an end my TV time is interrupted by the sudden and unexpected labour for my next baby. I wince in pain before calling for Bruce (the adult, not my kid of course) who comes quickly. I’d asked for him thinking he’d remain calm being a doctor and all, but he freaks out a second before running off shouting for Tony, in typical crazy-person fashion. I guess he tells the teens t watch their siblings, because quick as a blink, Tony Stark is whisking me off to hospital in my favourite BMW. Humph. He has his own.  “Stark, I've got amniotic fluid on my shoes.” Says Bruce as we stand at the front desk, and we both turn to glare at him. I pause momentarily to look at his shoes. It’s not a lie. I’m mostly just concerned about how it got there.

I leave the hospital 11 hours of pain later, carrying Baby 74; Steve Everard.